Stuff I Dislike: Hype Movies

You know those movies that build up so much hype because they have awesome commercials, really pretty actors and a famous name attached to them, and then fail so badly that you leave the theater and you don’t even laughter at the amount of failure you just paid upwards of 15 bucks for? Yeah, those are movies that I really, really hate. Here are some of the most recent movies that fooled me into thinking they were worth paying to see:

4. Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland

I was so unbelievably hyped for this movie. Come on, Johnny Depp playing the Mad Hatter, Tim Burton being the creature of Wonderland and Colleen Atwood creating the costumes! How could this possibly go wrong? Well, somehow it did. Very, very wrong. An enormous amount of amazing dialogue that appears in the book was cut from the script and replaced with very simplistic dialogue that robbed the characters of their depth and charm. The Mad Hatter wasn’t nearly as crazy and witty as I expected Burton or Depp to make him. Most of all, there was this weird sexual tension between the Mad Hatter and Alice that was just all sorts of wrong! (And let’s not even talk about the Mad Hatter’s spasmodic attack to end it all) Seriously Burton, I expected so much dark beauty to be exposed and there was just nothing.

3. Rob Epstein and Jeffrey Friedman’s Howl

From the very first whispers of its creation this film gave off a chill Indie vibe from its content and cas. James Franco as Allen Ginsberg = amazing combination. But that’s the only thing this movie had going for it. There were weird interjections of an animated version of the poem that didn’t really explore the subtext. The storyline didn’t follow any form of chronological order and Franco seemed overly depressed. Overall I didn’t even finish watching it.

2. Miguel Arteta’s Youth in Revolt

I must admit I have a bit of a thing for Michael Cera’s characters. So needless to say I was excited to hear he was doing another movie where he would play the outcast kid (but this time with an evil twin). I neglected to watch any trailers for this movie assuming that it would be, at the very least, okay. It wasn’t. The never-fail dorky boy going after and eventually catching not-so-dorky-yet-kinda-dorky-girl storyline was totally ruined. Nothing that happened made any sense at all! There was even less depth to Nick Twisp than Cera normally has when acting. Everything seemed outdated and dry, like the entire movie just needed some rain. There was just nothing good about it at all.

1. Lisa Cholodenko’s The Kids Are All Right

I tried really hard to like this one. I wanted to so badly. I just couldn’t. I missed The Kids Are All Right when it played in select theaters in the Village and ended up buying the dvd with a friend. It started pretty good. Normal family drama stirred up by children going behind the backs of their mothers to find their biological dad. The dad was chill; very earthy, very scruffy. Then it got a little unsettling when there was an unclear relationship between the daughter and her newly found dad. Then it got boring. I wanted so badly to feel for the characters as they got caught up in the escalating drama, but I couldn’t. The most interesting parts were too short and the dry (but brutally honest) parts dragged on. I left the movie confused about the children. Was the daughter’s heart broken by her father? Was the son gay? (The movie truly should have paid his situation more attention) One good thing? The soundtrack. Oh and Mia Wasikowska who plays the daughter. She’s an amazing actress who just needs to land some more roles.

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One thought on “Stuff I Dislike: Hype Movies

  1. “The Kids are Alright”–you actually bought this DVD? Doesn’t your local library lend out DVD’s. I did borrow a copy from my local library and still I could not bring myself spend 2 hours (more or less} to watch it.

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